Searching for Divine Help

I have turned to "A Course in Miracles" for spiritual guidance on handling the anonymous harassment my partner and I face. Its best known teacher, Marianne Williamson, has provided me with hope that God can turn this nightmare into a blessing for me and for the universe.

But my faith rests on a thin hope sometimes.

After two consecutive nights of being electronically zapped such that we could not sleep both nights, I began to doubt how this spiritual path could help me to overcome. This is an email I wrote Marianne (she is available by email as a member of her Miracle Matrix).

I will post a response if I get one.

Marianne:

I am a relatively new student of ACIM, and began committed, daily study and meditation after reading all of Marianne's books on one very exciting weekend. You could say I experienced a "pre-ACIM" miracle when God (whom I had given up on) decided to call me to him through the words of Marianne.

My motivation for investigating Marianne's teachings is quite bizarre and likely will be difficult for you to believe. My partner and I are aggressively, yet anonymously, stalked and harrassed 24/7.

Through the use of little-known, and yet publicly documented, technology pioneered for use by the military and secret service agencies as psychological operations weaponry, we are surveilled in our house and subject to various inexplicable electronically induced phenomena. Also, various mind-game tricks are played on us whenever we are in public.

This is the place where you might suggest a shrink. But let me assure you, I am in the care of a wonderful psychiatrist, whose early suspicions of delusional psychosis quickly gave way to a surprising, unreserved affirmation that what I am reporting to him must be real.

The purpose of the harassment seems to be to cause us to think we are insane, or to commit suicide because we can never escape the harassment. (Having our names called out but not being able to see the perpetrator, or being subjected to some type of electromagnetic wave from an adjacent rental home at night, so that we cannot sleep and feel queasy, etc.)

Why this is happening, we have no idea. This phenomenon, called "gang stalking," is reported by thousands of people worldwide. Google the terms "gang stalking," or "electronic harassment," and you will be opened up to a silent Holocaust of sorts. Women of Greenham Common, England, who protested U.S. bases in the 1970s, were subjected to a large-scale harassment of this type. (http://www.geocities.com/adrian9999999999/greenham.htm) Author Gloria Naylor ("Brewster Place") is a victim as well, and documented her experience in the book, "1996."

We are often dismissed as crazy, and some of these activities do indeed cause victims to become wildly paranoid. But these are simply effects of a very real, and yet almost unprovable, malicious cause.

I am writing Marianne for help in dealing with this situation by application of ACIM principles. I thank God that the principles of ACIM were shown me so that I could endure this nightmare.

My obstacle is this: As you can imagine, it is quite a stretch to practice offering forgiveness, and bearing no grievances, against the cruel, pathological renegades who have turned our house into a torture chamber for their amusement.

I therefore am quite blocked in being able to incorporate ideas such as "My attack thoughts against my harassers is keeping me in Hell." Or that "Forgiving my harassers is the only way I can be saved."

To me, their despicable, inhumane behavior toward us IS Hell. How does one stare true evil in the face and offer forgiveness, Marianne? I'm not speaking about hurt feelings in a relationship -- I am describing anonymous sick humans who want us dead!

And yet, the Holy Spirit is telling me He/She has brought me to the only place where my safety and survival are assured. So I am hopeful, but young in understanding, and feel like: "God, I believe; help thou my unbelief."

Marianne, it seems too much of a stretch for a mortal like me to view my attackers as holy, even as I see myself as holy. Theoretically, I can grasp that they are perfect examples of the Son of God in prison. But this is not theory, it is real, and painful.

I feel like I have been handed one of the more enormous leaps of faith to attempt, and although I know the Holy Spirit is the helper, I have not been able to see how this could possibly work.

My prayer is that someone as astute in matters of the spirit as you will see that this phenomenon is truly real, and there are Sons of God who live with this terror every day. Since God always has us in the only place and time we should be in, how can this be? How can I understand?

Yours in gratefulness for what has been learned so far...